Handholding
by thisloser
Summary: Kakashi and Gai have to pretend they're a couple. Yep, that's the whole story.
1. pretend you're gay!

A-Rank mission, that was the first thing the Hokage told them, the second thing she said – with something that looked an awful lot like a suppressed smirk, was, "Well, you'll have to pretend you're gay."

It was a strange sort of twist in a conversation that had lasted all of fifteen seconds, Kakashi thought.

"What?" he asked.

Gai didn't show as much restraint. "Hokage-sama!?"

"You heard right." Slowly and deliberately, Tsunade unrolled the mission scroll in front of her. "Don't look at me like that. This isn't the first time you've had to deal with… eccentrics, is it? Tsukeyaki's just a special type. Hates women, thinks they're disgusting and inferior and who knows what else… not that that's all _that_ special, now that I think about it." She sighed.

"Anyway, he doesn't even want to be around_ men_ who have sex with women. Maybe he's afraid he'll catch heterosexuality if a straight man sneezes on him." There was a smirk on her lips now, laying in wait. "It's ridiculous. The man is a complete moron, but he's rich and powerful, so people humor him."

Kakashi could already see how the pieces fit together. He didn't like the picture one bit. Next to him Gai shifted uncomfortably.

"Thankfully, he's decided that his huge estate is some kind of refuge for male homosexuals with nowhere else to go."

"I see." Kakashi figured he had to carry the conversation for both of them as Gai made no sound. "But for information gathering purposes, wouldn't it be better for someone to go in alone and seduce Tsukeyaki?"

That got him a _look_ from Gai, furrowed eyebrows and everything. _It's not like I'm volunteering_, he wanted to say. Tsunade, however, was already waving her hand in dismissal of his idea.

"We're not looking to get information from him. The man is clueless. He's got no idea what's going on right under his own nose. You think there weren't a million criminals just waiting for some naïve idiot to open his house to them? It's become a place for secret weapon and drug trade and who knows what else."

"So we might not be the only ones pretending…"

"Maybe." Tsunade shrugged. "Either way I need you to find out what's going on up there."

* * *

Kakashi slipped the mission scroll into his vest pocket and started walking back to his apartment, his thoughts already preoccupied with a list of things he'd need to pack. Gai was walking right next to him, hands buried in pockets Kakashi hadn't even known the spandex suit _had_, unusually quiet.

That was until he suddenly burst out like a predictable ancient geyser, "You know, Rival, we could just sneak in undetected. Then we wouldn't have to pretend anything! It would be a great challenge!"

Kakashi sighed. "It would also be stupid because if we got caught, we'd immediately have a fight on our hands."

"So? We can handle a fight!"

He glanced over at and Gai and practically recoiled from the fire in his friend's shining eyes. Why did _he _always have to be the voice of reason? "Sure. _We_ can. But there'll be civilians there – most of whom'll be innocent bystanders – in a relatively small, enclosed area; you're really willing to risk their lives when there's a much safer way?"

"…" That took care of the fire, like a well-aimed bucket of water.

Gai was pouting a little, marching on in silence until they entered their building.

"See you tomorrow!" With that and a tired half-wave, Kakashi began jogging up the stairs to his apartment, glad to be rid of Gai for the night at least.

After all, they'd probably see enough of each other in the coming weeks to last them a lifetime.

* * *

A.N.: So not sure about this, probably already dead in the water. But it's short. Maybe I'll manage short updates. RL is exhausting and terrible at the moment.


	2. storming the fortress?

The great thing about Gai was that he never pouted long. The very next day he was already waiting at the village gate, bright and early as ever, pacing up and down the street, his pack slung loosely over one shoulder. Kakashi watched him from the shadows for a bit. He'd bought an apple from the market and ate it while Gai stomped around the village entrance, glancing at his watch every five seconds.

Twenty minutes after he'd finished the apple and rolled up his mask, Kakashi left his hiding place and strolled down the street as if he was in the middle of his Sunday walk. He ignored the daggers Gai glared at him and intercepted Gai with a question before he had time to explode - an old trick that Kakashi had found to be a very effective tactic when dealing with his friend.

"You ready?" he asked, triggering the expected gasp of indignation from Gai.

"WH- Me?! I've been here for an hour! YOU'RE –"

Kakashi just smiled. "Great! Let's go then! No time to chat, Gai. I hate to say it, but we're running kind of late."

Gai, staggering from the force of Kakashi's shamelessness, his face red and splotchy, gasped once more.

"WE?! You're the one who—"

"Well, we've got to hurry, Gai, so don't dawdle!" And with that Kakashi set off through the gate, into the forest.

* * *

Three days wasn't a particularly long journey, but it wasn't exactly a short one either, 72 hours on the road were exhausting, even for a jounin of Kakashi's caliber. Travelling with Gai, though, always made the time pass much faster as Gai tended to talk through the whole trip, telling stories about his students, past missions and exciting training sessions. Kakashi liked his friend's chatter; it allowed him to drift in and out of listening while serving as a nice constant, something to anchor his attention and keep his thoughts off the darker roads they might go down otherwise.

Still, he was relieved when they finally got to the estate, all the way north near the border to Grass, where the forests were growing so thick, there were spots shrouded in permanent darkness because the light couldn't reach the mossy ground.

Gai saw the wall first and pointed it out to Kakashi, who pulled out his binoculars and scanned the area. The forest opened up into something that – at first glance – looked like a natural clearing, but after a few seconds, Kakashi spotted the blackened rock on the ground where plants had been burnt down to create the open space.

Kakashi had to run up a tree to be able to see the buildings, none of which were as high as the surrounding wall. He memorized the layout – four large, traditional shoin zukuri, one in each corner of the rectangular compound and each of them low buildings. None of them looked like they had more than one storey. Which was surprising, considering that, according to their mission scroll, the place had been a daimyo's castle once, until the lord had fallen in one of the smaller battles preceding the First Shinobi World War and his land had gone to Fire Country. Tsukeyaki had bought the property, rebuilt it, and had been living there as something of a recluse for more than a decade.

"This is more impressive than I thought it would be," Kakashi said as he hopped down from his vantage point. It was certainly larger than he had expected.

Gai glanced at him, then into the distance, then back at him again. A frown was drawing his brows together into a thick, black, jagged line. "It's a fortress, Rival," he announced dramatically, "but we could take it!"

Kakashi gave him a _look,_ silently wondering what he'd done to deserve this mission. "Innocent bystanders, remember?"

A huff from Gai and nothing else. As far as reactions went, Kakashi had hoped for something more professional. Weren't they past the stage where he had to explain to Gai that being a shinobi did not in fact mean running in with a battlecry on your lips and absolutely no plan in your head? Apparently not.

Better to just take the lead and move on, he decided.

"Anyway, I think it's time to come up with a story, don't you?" Somewhere in the distance, beyond the sheer endless forest, behind the wall, the compound, the buildings containing innocent and not so innocent men, the sun was no doubt already slipping past the horizon, and after three days of travel Kakashi longed to crawl into a warm bed, even one warmed by the man standing next to him. At this point, he really didn't care.

"Story? What story?" That clueless look on Gai's face, it made Kakashi wonder where he'd _been _for the last few days.

Kakashi could have said something cutting then, but instead he opted for a smile, the sweetest one in his repertoire. "Why Gai-kun," he said in a voice to match, slow and syrupy, "the story of our love, of course!"


	3. wondrous transformation miracle!

"We're supposed to be a couple, remember?" Kakashi added when Gai showed no reaction beyond changing the color of his face to a light shade of crimson. Just typical, Kakashi thought, Gai got flustered at the speed of light, hands clenched and nostrils flaring within seconds – and just as quickly he calmed down again.

Gai puffed out his chest and took a deep breath.

Kakashi braced himself.

"Hah, Kakashi, of course I remember! Who do you take me for?"

"So?" Kakashi prompted. He even managed to suppress the eye roll, barely.

"So! This is not like you, my Rival! Making a rookie-mistake like that!" Gai threw his head back, roaring with laughter in a way that made Kakashi want to dig a book out of his backpack. But before he had the chance, Gai leaned closer, continuing in a loud stage whisper, "_We'_re not supposed to be a couple, no, the people we'll _pretend _to be are supposed to be a couple!"

"Great. Your genius is dazzling."

"Isn't it, though?!" That manic glint in his eyes… It made even Kakashi wish he had something to shield himself from it.

Well, there was always sarcasm.

"I'm completely awestruck."

Which wasn't much of a comfort when your audience was one hundred percent immune to it. Gai's grin only widened, his teeth gleaming an eerie white in the smothered green semi-darkness of the thick forest.

"Hn, you haven't seen anything yet!" With a graceful shrug he let his backpack slide off his shoulders. "Kakashi, my Rival!" Gai exclaimed, his volume scaring up a murder of crows that burst black into the foliage, allowing shafts of orange light to pierce through for a few seconds. Gai used that magical moment to fling himself around in some bastardized version of a pirouette, shedding his vest and pulling frantically at his suit. He came to a halt only half-done, his suit gaping open, hair mussed. "Meet Yatou Tora!" he shouted, obviously pretending that this was the effect he'd been going for all along, that his transformation was complete and utterly perfect.

This time Kakashi did not hold back on the eye rolling.

"Tora? You sure you wanna go with that?" he drawled. "It's a little on the nose…"

But Gai wasn't listening. He was in glorious rant-mode, all aglow with pride in the character he'd invented.

"Tora-kun is the young, hot-blooded son of a farmer," he explained, waving his index finger in Kakashi's face. "He was born on a stormy night in November, the third of his family's four sons! As a matter of fact, the house was struck by lightning the night he was born and his poor, beloved mother died in the merciless flames—"

Kakashi would have proceeded to roll his eye, but the forest was starting to spin dangerously.

"How can he be the third of four kids if his mother died giving birth to him?" he asked instead.

"Haha, my Rival, such an intelligent question! A genius like you picks up on the smallest details! Actually! The fourth son, Yonmaru, was adopted after his biological parents died during an earthquake!"

"That's way too much back-story, Gai…" Kakashi groaned. And _Yonmaru?_ Gai's story was seriously making him want to crawl into a dark, damp hole. Frustrated, he tried to massage away the headache building behind his eyes, his fingers rubbing at his temples with more force than could be healthy. "The only important part is how he got here and why he's with me."

"What's your alias then?" Once more Gai was looking decidedly pouty.

"… Shiba Souku." Kakashi sighed. The name had only just occurred to him. It would do. "No siblings," he added snidely. "Although I might have had an older twin who died in the womb. His name would have been Ichimaru. It was very tragic."

Gai didn't even bat an eyelash. "Hm… Souku-kun?"

Kakashi shrugged.

"I figure we met at school. Childhood sweethearts, that sort of thing."

"Hmmm…" he really didn't like that curl of Gai's lower lip.

"What?"

"Such a bland story!"

"It's boring and believable, which makes it perfect for us. Let's say we built a small business together. A shop, maybe a general store, or a bookshop…"

Kakashi had to admit that he could picture himself owning a bookshop, almost too easily. As for "Tora"… he would have come in handy for the heavy lifting if nothing else.

"Anyway, it burned down; there's your drama." And their reason for showing up on Tsukeyaki's doorstep. "We lost everything and now we're looking for some way to start over," Kakashi finished, ignoring the disappointed look on Gai's face. "Let's get changed. We'd better make it to the gate before nightfall."

"Hmpf, I can be there in two seconds, Rival! And I'm not afraid to race you and prove it," Gai grumbled, the challenge punctuated by the high-pitched whine of his zipper being pulled down forcefully.

"Because nothing says _I love you_ like running away from someone," Kakashi sighed as he shrugged off his vest. "Can you try not to blow our cover within the first five minutes of the mission?"

"Wh—" Gai gasped, clearly offended. "I— Playfully chasing each other! Lovers do that! All the time!"

"So… when I catch you, we'll have a tumble in the grass?" Kakashi raised an eyebrow at Gai's crimson face and sputtering attempts to form a coherent reply. He tsked, shaking his head in disappointment. "Tora, our store just burned down. We've lost everything we had. I can't believe all you think about right now is sex."

"I—_Kakashi_!"

There was something extremely satisfying about driving Gai to the point where his eyes were tearing up out of frustration. Kakashi really couldn't hold back the smirk grazing his lips. Thankfully, he was still wearing his mask.

"It's Souku," he said gravely, "if you're supposed to be my boyfriend, you'd better at least remember my name."


	4. such tenderness!

In the end it took them sixteen minutes just to change out of their uniforms – or in Gai's case hideous spandex abomination – and into the worn Yukata and simple cotton pants they'd brought. As far as disguises went, Kakashi, thought they'd probably do. His outfit was a depressing grey, the fabric patternless and threadbare from having been washed a few times too often.

For some reason, Gai was not wearing anything green – Kakashi was still a little bit in shock about that – but a loose mustard colored combo that was probably very appropriate since it looked exactly like the kind of outfit a person would only wear if everything else they owned had been devoured by flames. Gai had rolled up the sleeves to show off his muscular arms, no doubt, while Kakashi wore a dark scarf to cover the lower half of his face and had put an eye patch over his left eye.

"Childhood accident," he said, stroking over the smooth surface of the patch with his fingertip, "I fell off a tree I was climbing when I was six. That's how I lost the eye. Anything I need to know about Tora?"

"Only that he's a hard-working, honest, hot-blooded twenty-nine year old man in the Springtime of his Youth!" Gai beamed.

So much for pretending to be different people, Kakashi thought. _The words Let me guess, his favorite food is super spicy curry _lay on his tongue, but then something else gave him pause.

"Twenty-nine?" Kakashi just couldn't keep himself from chuckling at that. "You made yourself a year younger, Gai? Really?"

"I'm not younger; Tora is! It's part of my cover!" Gai's eyebrows were bearing down into an expression of righteous indignation.

Unimpressed, Kakashi felt actual laughter bubbling from his belly to the tip of his tongue. Only Gai…

"I don't know," he said, a mischievous smile hiding under his scratchy scarf, "I think this might be putting the mission at unnecessary risk. People will probably be able to tell that you're really a thirty year old man. You've got that old man smell, Gai. Dead giveaway."

"How dare you, Kakashi! I don't smell like an old man! My scent is light and youthful! It's the scent of a flower bud before it has shown its tender blossom to the world. "

_Well, as the guy who'll have to see your tender blossom for next few weeks…_

He bit his tongue. There was no point in teasing Gai endlessly. They were on a mission after all, and it was about time they got going. Decisively, Kakashi picked up his backpack and slung it over his shoulder.

He gave Gai an easy smile.

"Let's go," he said.

* * *

They were halfway up the path leading to the gate when Gai asked the question.

"Do you think we should hold hands?"

Suddenly made uncomfortably aware of his hands dangling at his side, Kakashi mulled it over. Truth be told, he wasn't much of a hand holder. The woman he was currently seeing – in a casual, on and off kind of way – back in Konoha had never said anything about it – although he'd had short-term girlfriends who'd complained about his standoffish nature.

"I don't know," he replied honestly. "Is that the kind of couple we want to play?"

"What do you mean? We're together! And we just lost our home! That means we're all we have!" Gai nodded vigorously to himself.

"So… that's all there is to it?" Kakashi asked.

"Of course! We love each other, don't we?"

"Well, that would be part of the mission." Kakashi sighed, looking up at the high stone wall and the thick wooden gate that still separated them from their target area. Once they were inside, there'd be no turning back. He was about to say something to that effect, but then Gai simply took his hand, wrapping his fingers around Kakashi's and marching on like it was the most natural thing in the world, tugging Kakashi along.


	5. touching in new and exciting places!

There he was, Shiba Souku, young owner of a quaint little bookstore – make that former young owner of said quaint little bookstore, since now he was bereft, left with nothing but the shirt on his back and the man by his side. Under the scratchy fabric of his scarf, Kakashi's lips quirked into something suspiciously smirk-like. He knew how he was going to play this.

"Tora," he said, his voice barely above a whisper, "I'm scared." The words rolled smoothly of his tongue, like polished marbles. He'd found that it could do a lot for him, using the more polite pronoun, a tiny change, but more than enough to give Gai pause, make him stop pounding the gate with his fist and frown at Kakashi as if he'd started speaking in tongues.

Gai was slow on the uptake, as usual. Kakashi decided to keep going, with or without his support, he'd catch up eventually, he always did. So to move their little act along if nothing else, Kakashi grabbed Gai's wrist and looked into his confused eyes imploringly.

"What will we do if they don't take us in? Where will we go?" The trick lay in not raising his voice, in talking to no one but "Tora".

And it was surprising, but Kakashi saw it finally, the darkness shifting in Gai's eyes. _Don't blow this now_, he thought, _don't overact_. The possibility of sudden sunsets made him cringe.

"We'll find something," Gai said with just a hint of uncertainty, obviously still feeling his way along, following Kakashi's lead.

That was good. That was better than Kakashi had dared to hope. He knew there was someone on the other side of that wall and this was exactly what Kakashi wanted him to hear.

"It's going to be okay…" Gai was steadily growing more confident, which wasn't always a good thing, but Kakashi decided to go with it for now. The sky above them was a soothing, velvety black, and Gai's eyes were still dry.

_Time to really sell this. _Kakashi didn't hesitate; in one big step he was in Gai's personal space, close enough to feel the warmth radiating off his body, but still not close _enough._ It took another small step for Kakashi to realize that he was too tall, or maybe Gai was too short. He couldn't quite get the effect he'd wanted. Burying his face in Gai's chest was out of the question, he had to stoop a little just to effectively bury it in the side of Gai's shockingly sweaty neck.

After an awkward second, Gai got the idea and wrapped his arms around Kakashi, who was starting to wonder how exactly it was possible for a human being to have a body as hard and angular as Gai's. It felt like he was hugging a wooden training pole.

Maybe it was simply the novelty of it; after all he'd never hugged Gai before. Gai had always been the one who'd embraced him. Usually against his will. And that was a different kind of experience; Gai would squeeze the air right out of his lungs while Kakashi's mind would be preoccupied with nothing but enduring.

"Whatever happens, I'll protect you. Always. I promise." Gai's lips were close enough to brush the shell of Kakashi's ear; his words warm gusts of breath. It was odd to hear a cheesy line like that in real life – not that Gai didn't spout cheesy lines all the time, but Kakashi wasn't usually at the receiving end of this particular brand of schmaltz. Kakashi loved this kind of thing in novels, he couldn't lie about that, but he wasn't the kind of person who'd ever say this stuff to an actual lover. Which was kind of funny, considering he'd never hesitated to tell a teammate that he had their back.

Kakashi pushed his thoughts aside and stayed firmly in character. Souku was to be a bit of a wimp, he'd decided, not too bright – although not exactly stupid either – definitely weak-willed and insecure. He'd hide behind Tora, who'd play the part of the big, boisterous, somewhat simple-minded oaf. _A role Gai should be able to pull off easily enough_, Kakashi thought as Gai awkwardly petted his head as if Kakashi was some kind of overeager puppy.

He'd been tempted to whisper something like _Is this how you touch your girlfriends?_ into Gai's ear, but they were both spared that particular conversation – at least for the time being – when one heavy wing of the gate was pulled inwards. Slowly but surely it scraped over the rocky ground – Kakashi used the moment to disentangle himself from Gai and straighten his Yukata – to reveal a young man standing forlornly on the stone path leading into the darkness.

_Just a boy_, Kakashi thought, _all by himself? _He couldn't sense anyone else in the vicinity, only the kid, and he really wasn't much more than that, Naruto's age maybe, give or take a year. It made Kakashi instantly suspicious. Among shinobi, age wasn't an indicator of anyone's level of skill, but this boy gave off only the slightest hint of chakra – nowhere near enough to master even the most simple ninjutsu. He was a civilian, Kakashi was sure of that.

"I'm sorry I made you wait…" the boy bowed, his mop of tousled brown hair obscuring his face. "We weren't expecting guests."

"Ah, no…!" Gai gestured dismissively.

"We're the ones who have to apologize," Kakashi chimed in. He bowed as well, even more deeply than the boy had, and instantly heard the _whoosh _of displaced air as Gai practically whipped into an even more exaggerated super-speed bow, almost breaking his nose on his kneecaps. Had they been alone, Kakashi would have given him a whack on the back of his head.

But they had an audience now, so all he could do was force a smile and hope for the best.

* * *

A.N.: I'm alive - more or less. Thanks to everyone who commented! Things aren't great, but I'm trying and that's really all you can do, isn't it?


	6. just out of kicking range

"Aaah, there's really no need…" the boy bowed twice more, a frantic edge to his jerky movements. Kakashi really wanted to glare at Gai, however he didn't want to risk it. He'd already decided that Souku was supposed to be meek and devoted to his stupid boyfriend…

Although… There were other types of couples… Maybe Souku could even be on the lookout for a new man in his life? Maybe Kakashi should go with his initial idea and try to get into Tsukeyaki's bed after all?

"I'm Shiba Souku," he said finally, shelving his new strategy for the time being. He had a feeling Gai wouldn't like it and he didn't need the complication. Gai for his part was standing up straight again, smiling the vacant smile of someone who had no clue what to say or do next. "This is Yatou Tora," Kakashi offered, gesturing over to his partner like Gai was a product on display. "My…" he trailed off deliberately, feigning insecurity. Kakashi directed a kind of _I can't really spell it out, can I? _look at the ground, hopefully enough for the kid to catch a whiff of old, well-ingrained shame.

"My name is Jun," the boy said, bowing again, like some kind of human yo-yo. He was less awkward than Gai, but not by a lot. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

No family name. Kakashi studied the youth, took in the rolled up sleeves and pants, exposing sparsely muscled, tanned limbs. From the collar of his pale blue Yukata to the tips of his _geta_ Jun was dressed like a servant. He acted like one, too, but Kakashi didn't like taking things at face value and he certainly didn't want to give the impression that Souku was the kind of person to assume, no matter how obvious something seemed to be.

"Do you work here?" he asked. "Because… you see…"

He stammered just enough and ducked his head. "We were hoping… Satoru-san said—" It would have been a good moment for Tora to swoop in and at least touch Souku's shoulder, maybe even finish the sentence, support him somehow, but Gai continued to stand around stiffly as if he had been ordered to guard the patch of dirt under his feet. He didn't move a muscle and, growing more and more irritated, Kakashi felt like pinching him or stepping on his foot.

But Jun helped him out, his eyes lighting up with recognition.

"Ah! Satoru-san? You know him?" the boy asked, then paused and frowned at himself. "Oh, of course you do, I mean, you're here! I'm sorry! That was a silly question! You need a place to stay?"

"That would be—" Kakashi made a show of swallowing the standard polite reply. As a man who'd lost everything in a fire, he couldn't rely on mere politeness anymore. He had to pawn pride for honesty. "We really do. _Tora _and I _really_ need a place to stay." It was the best he could do with Gai standing just out of kicking range.

Gai blinked like he was waking up; his previously unfocused eyes darted over to Kakashi. "Eh? Oh! Yes! Yes, my _LOVE_!" Kakashi wanted to slap him.

"Please," he said to Jun, forcing a helpless smile, "we're exhausted."

"I'll have to talk to Yasu-sama, but don't be worried!"Jun was nodding encouragingly. If Gai's stupid line had made him suspicious, he sure wasn't showing it. "Yasu-sama would never send someone like you away! He always says that we all have to stick together."

"Thank you." Kakashi bowed once more. He couldn't remember the last time he'd been this formal. Very deliberately he did not look over to see what Gai was doing. He was pissed off enough for one night.

"Come right this way, please." Jun took a small step back, allowing Kakashi and Gai to pass through the gate. "I'll go and talk to the master."

* * *

Ten minutes later Kakashi sat down on "their" bed. After a brief disappearance, Jun had shown them to a room in the main building, wished them a good night and left. Now Gai was standing at the window, frowning into the darkness on the other side of the glass.

"Do you really think everyone else is already asleep?" he asked Kakashi. "We should go outside, take a look around, Rival! I'm sure we'll solve this case in—"

_It was just too much._


	7. how to train your stick insect

It took Kakashi less than two seconds to cross the room, grab Gai by the shoulders and slam him into the wall with just the right amount of restraint to make the attack seem at least somewhat playful.

"Shut up, Tora," Kakashi whispered into Gai's ear. Gai's shoulders were rock hard under his hands, wrought with tension and fight or flight conflict. Kakashi knew that – had he been anyone else - Gai would have beaten him down before he'd so much as brushed him with his fingertips. "No breaking character unless we've got no other choice. I need you to get better at this. Understood?" He slid one hand down the front of Gai's yukata, tracing the border of the fabric to the belt.

Gai squirmed. "There's no one here. Just us."

"This is our first night. We have no idea how many people are in the house, much less on the property. We don't know who they are and we don't know how suspicious they are of new arrivals. We're not taking any risks, okay?" He pulled down his scarf as he spoke, nuzzling Gai's cheek and gently dragging him away from the wall and in front of the window, so their silhouettes would be visible from outside.

"I know it's awkward, but this is the mission," he murmured against Gai's skin, tiny stubble scraping his lips. "We can't let our guard down."

Gai remained quiet. He stood stiffly, arms at his sides.

It was no good.

"Put your hands on my hips," Kakashi ordered. "Come on. We're supposed to be a couple. You know how to do this, don't you?"

Gai's hands settled on his hips for an instant before withdrawing again. He kept them hovering centimeters from Kakashi's body, as if to catch Kakashi should he suddenly fall.

"We don't need to go this far when no one's watching," Gai said.

"It's practice. I can't have you do another stick insect impersonation when we actually meet Tsukeyaki."

He could actually feel the heat rising to Gai's face. "Stick Insect?! Kakashi—"

"I told you! It's _Souku_." This was exasperating. Kakashi tugged at the knot in Gai's sloppily tied belt, working his fingers beneath the fabric. "This has gone on too long already. If you didn't want the mission, why didn't you just say so before we got here? Tsunade-sama could have sent Asuma or Genma or someone else."

"What are you saying?! I'd never back down from a mission!"

"Too bad. You're no good to me like this."

A moment's lapse in the argument that allowed Kakashi to untie the belt and slide the open yukata off Gai's shoulders. He took a small step back, surveying his handiwork. Gai stood topless before him, looking down at his bare feet. His hands had dropped back to his sides, as expected he made no move toward Kakashi.

"It just…" Eyes darting guilty to a distant corner of the room, Gai paused. "It doesn't seem right… Duping civilians."

Well, it wouldn't, Kakashi thought, not to someone who'd never made it into Anbu.

"As a shinobi, I want to test my skill against other shinobi and kunoichi! I want to have hot-blooded battles—" Gai was getting dangerously close to ranting, his voice rising steadily. He was as short-sighted as ever.

"Shhh!" Kakashi hissed, moving closer again. He put his hands on Gai's shoulders, looking into his eyes. "Gai. We're protecting them," he said. "Why do you think Omiyage-san went to the Hokage? If this goes on and the daimyo orders a so called _official investigation_, do you really think they'll bother actually investigating? They'll simply shut Tsukeyaki down. They'll probably arrest everyone." Kakashi had memorized the contents of the mission scroll. He knew exactly what kind of charges Tsukeyaki and his merry band of misfits were facing. "No one will care enough about a bunch of old men who take it up the ass to make sure they're actually guilty."


	8. meditations on acorns

Truth be told, Kakashi thought lying in bed a few minutes later, he wasn't sure _he_ cared. This was a mission, which meant he'd fulfill it at any cost, but he didn't have strong feelings when it came to matters such as this. On some level, he even found that Tsukeyaki was to blame for being naïve enough to take in random strangers based on their sexual preferences alone.

It was a stupid thing to do.

As for the whole gay-thing, Kakashi honestly didn't have an opinion about it. He thought it strange that it seemed to matter to others. Konoha was fairly liberal – in that no Hokage had ever cared and shinobi generally measured a person's worth not by who they fucked but how well they fought. There had been the occasional mission where he'd picked up certain vibes and had used them to his advantage. Flirting was something he was good at and he'd soon realized that his looks appealed to members of either sex. Gai on the other hand had –if history was anything to go by – the kind of look that seemed to appeal to neither.

Kakashi allowed himself a derisive smirk, hidden by the darkness alone as his scarf was currently draped over the back of a chair with the rest of his clothes. He shifted in bed, rolling onto his side to face Gai. It was awkward, but he'd been the one to insist on sleeping naked. If anyone should "happen" to burst into their room during the night it would look more natural, Kakashi was convinced of that. Plus it wasn't like they didn't see each other naked on a fairly regular basis anyway. Gai's at the time acorn-sized penis had been one of the first ones Kakashi had ever laid eyes on, the third to be exact, after his own and his dad's. In a way, he was already far more familiar with it than he had any right or desire to be.

Still Kakashi had to admit that he occasionally got something out of the fact that his dick was significantly bigger than Gai's. There were also times when he wondered whether they would have become "rivals" if it had been the other way around, whether their whole relationship might not, in the end, boil down to penis-size. Kakashi enjoyed the absurdity of the thought; it amused him. To be quite honest, though, he could see it actually being the case. It would certainly explain a lot about Gai's personality, that constant need to prove himself…

Either way Kakashi felt the urge to tuck his thing between his legs. He really didn't need the awkwardness of it rubbing against the backs of Gai's thighs, although he knew on some level that it was bound to happen eventually. There probably was no way around it.

Thankfully, the bed was wide enough to allow them an inch of distance between their bodies. Gai had turned away from Kakashi; he was facing the wall, on his side, his hair falling onto the pillow in a way that made it look like a dark pool of blood. In the grey semi-darkness of the room, Kakashi could see the gentle movement of Gai's regular breathing.

Clearly, he was sulking by pretending to be asleep.

Kakashi didn't get it. Ever since they'd begun the mission, Gai's mood had seemed to be in constant flux. One moment he was his usual over-enthusiastic self, boasting about his acting skills and asking Kakashi to hold his hand, and the next he was stiff, awkward and barely able to touch Kakashi. It was annoying.

And now Gai was lying in bed, sulking because Kakashi had told him he didn't want to risk sneaking around the property on their first night.

_Not before we've met Tsukeyaki and whoever else is staying here,_ Kakashi had said.

Under their shared blanket – there'd been only one on the bed and Kakashi had decided that asking for another one would be too suspicious – Kakashi reached out and put a hand on Gai's hip. No reaction. Maybe he wasn't pretending after all.

Gai's skin was warm and smooth under Kakashi's fingertips.

If he closed his eyes, it occurred to Kakashi, touching Gai might not feel all that different from touching her.

And wasn't that a scary thought?


	9. here comes a new challenger!

_Yugao. _

Why was he thinking about her when he was miles and miles away from Konoha, not to mention lying in bed with someone else? It probably wasn't a good sign.

Kakashi stared at the nape of Gai's neck, wondering. He didn't miss her, did he? They didn't have _that _kind of relationship. He liked her, that much he couldn't deny. She was talented, smart, strong; she excelled as an Anbu – and, yes, she also happened to be beautiful. And yet Kakashi knew the main reason they had started sleeping together was that they both counted on the other being emotionally unavailable. He knew that whenever he touched her, she closed her eyes, imagining his hands belonging to someone else – a man who was long gone.

_I will never forget Hayate_, she had told him, her tone completely matter of fact.

_I wouldn't want you to,_ he'd replied just as coolly.

They met up for sex, that was all. She never stayed the night when she dropped by his place and neither did he when he came to hers. It was a very simple arrangement.

It meant nothing.

So why was he thinking about her?

Kakashi groaned softly and pushed himself up into a sitting position.

The room was quiet, filled only with the soft, regular sound of Gai's breathing. Kakashi listened to it for a few seconds, convinced now that Gai really was fast asleep. Not for the first time Kakashi found himself envious of Gai's ability to fall asleep quickly whenever he wanted. For Kakashi it wasn't that easy even when he was as exhausted as he was now. His mind never really rested and right now it was in overdrive, very much against his will.

Yugao's smooth, pale skin haunted him. Moonlight – that gentle white glow coming through the small window – conjured up her image.

Kakashi reached over and touched Gai's naked shoulder. "Tora, I need to go to the bathroom. I'll be back in a minute, okay?" As expected there was barely a reaction from Gai, nothing but a faint mumble, a twitch of the shoulder as if to shrug off Kakashi's hand.

He knew he was being a hypocrite, after all, hadn't he given Gai a full lecture about staying in the room for the duration of the night? Keeping a low profile until they knew more about their surroundings? Kakashi had said all those things, but the way he saw it, Shiba Souku was probably a guy with a weak bladder. He might also happen to be the kind of person who couldn't remember directions all that well. So he'd forget the way to the bathroom that Jun had shown them, he'd end up wandering around for a bit…

Kakashi slipped out of bed and into a pair of boxers. After a second of contemplation, he also put on his Yukata but left the scarf draped over the back of a chair. He wasn't planning on running into anyone.

Barefoot, Kakashi padded into the dark hallway, wooden floorboards creaking softly with every step. Earlier, Jun had led them along the wall to the building closest the gate. It was a guest house, a small and simple wooden house with unadorned walls and few windows. Kakashi and Gai had waited there while Jun had dashed off across the compound to the largest shoin-zukuri style house located to the north-west. _So that's where Tsukeyaki sleeps,_ Kakashi had thought, filing away the information for future reference. He'd waited attentively next to the entrance to the guest house, barely glancing at his surroundings as if he was too tired to even look up, but he'd counted the seconds in his head. Jun needed a good five minutes from their position to get to the front door of Tsukeyaki's building.

He wasn't going to risk a trip there tonight, Kakashi decided. He'd stay – if not inside – then at least close to the guest house.

Kakashi headed into the direction of the bathroom, down the hallway and around a corner. There was someone else there, he could feel the tiny flicker of unfocused chakra. Not Jun, though. Someone else. Watching his every move. Kakashi kept walking, taking big, clumsy steps on the wooden floor. At every little noise he cringed in an exaggerated manner. He stopped in front of the door, listening. He inhaled the stale air and picked up the scent of another man.

As if on cue, he heard the floorboards creak behind him – far closer than he'd thought possible – and then the man who'd managed to sneak up on him spoke up, "Why what do we have here? Are you lost, little lamb?"


	10. like a house on fire

Kakashi whipped around, the movement exaggerated for dramatic effect, and quickly pulled his yukata closed over his bare chest. Startled maiden was the impression he was going for. Clutching the fabric, cowering a little as if he was a blushing virgin who'd been surprised by an intruder in her bedroom.

"Who -?!" he gasped despite already being in the middle of analyzing his opponent.

The man before him was shorter than he'd expected, short but muscular, his well-defined chest visible under his open, sleeveless yukata. There were bandages around his midriff, but Kakashi couldn't see any suspicious protrusion betraying a concealed weapon. Then again, a lot of small weapons were incredibly easy to hide.

The man's dark hair was pulled back tightly into a stub of a ponytail. At the front, strands of hair had already fought their way out of their confinement and were hanging into his hard and narrow face. His skin was a shade darker than Gai's and what at first glance had looked like a shadow transformed into a gnarled scar running across the right side of his neck when he cocked his head and stepped closer to Kakashi.

"Now, now, calm down. I didn't mean to scare you or anything." His voice was honeysuckle sweet; hands raised in a surrendering gesture, the man studied Kakashi from head to toe.

_Yeah, right, _Kakashi thought. He took a step backwards, putting a little more distance between himself and the stranger.

The other man stayed put. "Couldn't sleep is all…" he said. "But… hmmm, when Jun-chan told me we had visitors, he didn't mention how pretty you were. I'd have dropped by sooner if I'd known…" There was an open leer on his face now. His narrow hazel eyes were trained firmly on Kakashi, his gaze sliding up and down the length of his body, leaving Kakashi with a feeling like he was repeatedly being dipped in slime. He could feel that look clinging to him.

"I— I apologize if I woke you up. _My boyfriend_ and I just arrived less than an hour ago. I was looking for the restroom; I didn't mean to disturb anyone." Kakashi kept his demeanor meek, he lowered his head, letting the fall of his hair obscure his eye and scarred eyelid. He'd seen enough.

"Don't worry, you didn't disturb me. And even if you had, seeing your beautiful face would have cheered me right up!" This time the other man did take a step towards Kakashi. Still, Kakashi couldn't feel a discernible change in his chakra. It was so low he could barely even sense it. "Say, your boyfriend… is he as handsome as you?"

There was a glint in those eyes, a dangerous spark you didn't see until it had lit your house on fire.

Kakashi decided to dodge the question.

"Ah… I should probably go—" he began, making a move towards the other man who was standing in the middle of the hallway, blocking the path back to their room.

"Hey, now, don't go! You haven't even told me your name yet! It'd be pretty rude to just run off like that, wouldn't it?"

"I'm Shiba Souku. It's nice to meet you." Kakashi bowed quickly.

"Kaneshiro Kirie, at your service. See, that didn't even hurt one bit. Now… do you always sleep dressed like that?"

Even someone as mild-mannered as Souku should get irritated by this kind of question, Kakashi thought. He narrowed his eye at Kirie and frowned at the shameless smirk that was directed at him in reply.

"I'm sorry, I don't see how this is—"

"Any of my business, hm? You're a cold one, aren't you! I'm just showing concern for your health! You don't have to torture yourself on a hot summer night like this! It would be totally okay to walk around naked, no one would mind! After all, we're all men here!"

There were only a few centimeters between them now, and Kakashi realized that if he wanted to get past and Kirie didn't move out of the way, he'd have to flatten himself against the wall and try to scoot past.


	11. バナナ

A.N.: Sorry. Mixed up the chapters.

* * *

"Thank you," he said, making sure he sounded like he was doing is absolute best to stay composed. "But I need to go back to my room now. If Tora wakes up, he'll worry and come looking for me."

_My boyfriend will protect me; that's what he does. I may be scared of you, but I have absolute faith in Tora. _Kakashi wanted Kirie to get that message loud and clear. Playing the coward wasn't too difficult but selling the whole _My lover will come and save me-_ bit was a challenge, especially since Kakashi knew what kind of person said "lover" really was.

_Well, Gai _is_ strong. And he _would _come and save me if I needed him to. But sadly he's still… well… a complete idiot._

As if he'd been able to read Kakashi's mind, Kirie started to laugh.

"Tora? Hell of a name! Souku and Tora, eh? That must make for a lot of wanwan-style nyannyan!"

A dangerous moment. Kakashi had to bite back a snort. Thanks to Jiraiya-sama he had developed a terrible weakness for stupid dirty jokes. Souku, though, was supposed to be appalled and offended.

"Please excuse me. Have a good night," he said and began to push his way past Kirie, who refused to budge, murmuring, "Now, now—"

Kakashi tried a little harder, but instead of making room Kirie reached for him. It was a quick grab on his blind side, and yet Kakashi still actively had to keep himself from dodging and counter-attacking. He allowed Kirie's hand to close around his biceps. "I just don't see how I'll ever be able to take my eyes off you." That tone… It was low and held an edge that Kakashi hadn't heard from Kirie before. The playful glint in his eyes had sharpened into something different as well.

_He's not buying it… He's suspicious… Can he sense my chakra?_

The hint of a smile grazed Kirie's thin lips as he stared at Kakashi as if he could look right through him. It wasn't enough to make Kakashi lose his cool – nowhere near – but it did make him wonder whether the mission would be shorter than he'd thought.

Footsteps came down the hallway. The sound of bare feet on wooden floorboards. Kirie's smile widened. He let go the very moment Kakashi saw Gai rounding the corner.

Gai was completely naked. He walked, one hand on his hip, the other inexplicably holding a half-peeled banana.

"Ah! Souku!" Kakashi was endlessly relieved that Gai had gotten at least this much right. From here he could probably take it. "I was looking for you!" Gai exclaimed and promptly took a bite of his banana.

"Tora…" This time Kakashi really did push past Kirie; he practically ran towards Gai, grabbing his free hand and intertwining their fingers as soon as he had made it to his side.

"Oh, the famous boyfriend has arrived!"Kirie was smirking at them. He made a show of giving Gai a slow once-over. "Well,_ he_ gets the idea doesn't he?" he asked. "Too bad he's not much to look at, though…" His gaze lingered on Gai's crotch and he raised an eyebrow, his smirk widening. "There's literally not much to look at, is there?"

"Eh?" Gai bit off another piece of his banana and chewed thoughtfully. "Do we know each other?"

Like a child Kakashi tugged on Gai's hand. "Tora, let's go back. I'm exhausted…"

Gai shot him a confused glance, but he didn't protest when Kakashi led the way back to their room with nothing more than a forced "I guess we will see you tomorrow, Kirie-san" directed at the grinning stranger.

* * *

Kakashi slid the door shut behind him and waited, listening for any sound coming from the other side. Nothing. _Kirie must have gone in the other direction._

Finally, when he was sure there was no one within hearing distance, he turned to Gai and voiced the question that had been haunting him ever since Gai had wandered around the corner earlier.

"Why are you walking around naked?"

Gai blinked like it had never even occurred to him that anyone might ask him that. "Huh, well, there are only men here, so there's really no need to put on clothes! You should use this chance and let your skin breathe, too!" And he was grinning, _of course_ he was grinning.

"Ugh…" Kakashi allowed himself the luxury of a groan. Those two seconds of not having to pretend he loved Gai were a tiny piece of heaven. "And where did you get that?" He pointed at what was left of the banana in Gai's hand.

"Hm? There was a bowl of fruit in one of the rooms. I thought no one would mind if I took one."

"Pretty brave of you to eat that. I would have been too worried about where it might have been… You didn't find it in a bedroom, did you?"

"Heh? There was a bed, but –" Gai frowned, clearly not able to make the connection between places a banana could have been and bedrooms. "More importantly, who was that guy you were talking to?"

"Maa," Kakashi said, replaying the strange encounter in his mind._ I just don't see how I'll ever be able to take my eyes off you. " _I wonder…"


	12. communication sensation

This time Kakashi went to bed in his boxers. He figured the encounter with Kirie would be a good enough reason for timid little Souku to keep his underpants on, just in case the perverts came knocking. Gai settled in behind him, the mattress dipping, followed by a tug on the blanket.

Kakashi blinked into the grey moonlight leaking in through the window. Kirie, hm? Wasn't that a woman's name anyway? But other than that, Kirie really didn't fit his idea of homosexual males. Too… _masculine_, no different from him or Gai.

He knew he was being an ass. He'd never been close to anyone who was gay – as far as he knew, that was. _There might be a few in Konoha_, Kakashi thought, but shinobi liked to keep their love lives private. Generally, people didn't announce they were an item until they were about to make the whole thing official by getting married. So if you couldn't get married anyway…

Kakashi didn't judge books by their covers; looking underneath the underneath was his philosophy, and yet… He'd only ever met the usual onnagata in the pleasure districts of the cities. Apart from that there'd been two targets during his Anbu days, two men who'd been vulnerable to a _certain _approach, but Kakashi hadn't taken it very far. He'd needed to get them alone into a room with him and he'd succeeded without even as much as taking off his shirt. Probably the two easiest assassinations of his entire career. The men had been slimy and over-eager. Kakashi would have bet that they wouldn't have lasted more than ten seconds, not that he would have given them the chance.

Kirie, though… He'd stared at Kakashi, that was true. But there'd been something different about that stare. It hadn't been just lust. It had been calculating, too. Kakashi could have kicked himself. Kirie had seen Gai naked. One glance at that body and anyone would know that Gai wasn't a mere shop assistant.

"Put some clothes on next time," Kakashi hissed into the darkness, aiming to sound like an enraged wife, the nagging, know-it-all-kind. Souku couldn't be all sweet all the time, he decided. Someone had to wear the pants in this relationship, and it sure as hell wasn't going to be _Tora._

The silence that followed was palpable. Gai was having difficulties; there was a chance he couldn't tell whether Kakashi was acting, Kakashi realized. It irked him. Their teamwork was usually better than this.

He was about to elbow Gai in the ribs when a reply came.

"I'm sorry."

That was neutral enough, but Kakashi wasn't satisfied. "Put your arm around me," he whispered, his mock seductive tone still tinged with a hint of irritation.

Like some kind of suspicious animal Gai's hand crept across his side, tickling Kakashi's sensitive skin. Kakashi put his own hand over Gai's to make it stop and to test the theory he'd come up with. With his index finger he drew a character on the warm space between knuckles and wrist.

_Here?_

Gai snuggled in closer which wasn't what Kakashi had wanted, but then he felt Gai's lips brush the back of his neck. A tentative up and down motion, clearly a nod.

_Can you sense him?_

Headshake.

_Me neither. Ideas?_

Gai's fingers could be surprisingly nimble. Under the blanket they found the inside of Kakashi's forearm. Calloused fingertips swept over his skin in forceful strokes.

_I'll go find him._

Great. This again. Kakashi's first instinct was to ram his elbow backwards into Gai's too warm and too close stomach. He followed his second one and wrote a quick reply instead.

_No._

A gust of hot air hit his neck like fiery dragon breath. Gai's stupid temper. Kakashi could practically hear him grind his teeth in frustration. To prevent further "discussion" of the topic, he grabbed Gai's hand, interlaced their fingers and held on tightly.

"Let's go to sleep, _my love," _he said.

"I love you," Gai said to the back of Kakashi's neck and he might have written something on the back of his hand then if Kakashi had let him.


	13. morning glory

Kakashi had a very clear memory of thinking, _I'll never be able to fall asleep like this_. He'd been lying in bed with one of Gai's arms wedged under his waist and the other wrapped around him. It'd been too warm, Gai's breath tickling him every few seconds, the sound of his breathing like that of all of Kakashi's eight ninken combined.

He remembered the moment he'd braced himself for a long night lying awake. He'd closed his eyes for a second, taken a deep breath and when he opened them again…

Kakashi found himself blinking into warm sunlight. The window was closed like he'd left it, blinds open. He could see the wide expanse of blue sky, cut off by the clear, dark line of the wall's edge. Next to him Gai shifted, then groaned and stretched his arms over his head, arching his back.

"Good morning, my –" Kakashi could practically hear the unspoken "Rival" ring out. He shot Gai a glare and Gai's face twisted into a grimace as he swallowed the forbidden word. "Love!" he finished instead. At least he had the decency to look guilty.

Kakashi decided to punish him by leaning over and brushing his lips across Gai's stubbly cheek. After one night it already felt like kissing a porcupine. "Good morning to you, too," he murmured against Gai's skin. To his own surprise he found the scratching sensation a little tantalizing. It was new. Maybe that was it. He nuzzled closer, rubbing his nose against the side of Gai's face. He inhaled and ended up almost tasting Gai's heavy, musky scent. But then, it _was_ funny how still Gai held, how his cheeks were getting rosy under all that stubble.

Kakashi chuckled and pulled away, the mattress creaking with his movement. "Come on," he said, hopping out of bed,"you stink. Let's go find out if there's a bathtub or a shower somewhere."

* * *

They left their room hand in hand. With time, Kakashi knew he would be getting used to Gai's calloused palm in his, but for now it was still strange. Although Gai had touched him countless times over the years, holding hands like this was something they'd never done before until the previous night. And why would they have? Now, though, it was necessary.

Kakashi interlaced their fingers and pressed close to Gai. He wanted to look insecure and intimidated. They were in a stranger's house, not just guests but charity cases. Any man in this situation would be anxious not to make any mistakes, to save what little face he had left.

"Do you think we should call out?" he whispered to Gai. Gai glanced at him, his brow wrinkled in contemplation.

Then he sucked in a breath and – to Kakashi's horror – yelled, _"Oi!"_ at the top of his lungs. Frustrated, Kakashi stepped on his foot.

"What? You said—"

"I was _asking_—"

Footsteps. Kakashi listened to the creaking of floorboards ad counted down the seconds under his breath. Gai tensed, shooting him another _look._ Kakashi caught him shifting his stance, putting weight on his right foot and held on to his hand more tightly. Gai was about to go into fight mode and he couldn't have that. Not yet.

Around the corner came Jun, skidding on his white _tabi_, towels pinned under his arm, a smile on his face that looked tacked on and shaky.

"Ah, I'm so sorry!" And with that Jun was bowing again. The kid was a walking apology.

"There's no need—" Kakashi was torn between reaching out to the boy and letting him run his course. Jun, however, wasn't even listening. He was spewing a stream of words, so quickly that Kakashi wondered how long he could keep going before running out of breath.

"I didn't think you would be up yet! I should have told you yesterday, breakfast is at eight and you can use the bath, of course! Oh, there's a shower too, and—"

"Splendid, young man!" Gai's booming voice could have cut off a lion mid-roar, and for once Kakashi was grateful for it. Gai took a decisive step towards the kid and snatched the towels away from him. "Thank you! Can you show us the way, please?"

Jun blinked. "Ah? Um… It's… Um, follow me, please."

Kakashi felt a little sorry for the kid when Gai grabbed Jun's shoulder, turned him around as if he was some kind of ragdoll and started pushing him down the hallway.

"Lead the way, Boy!"

As Kakashi watched them march on ahead, he flexed the fingers of his empty right hand.

* * *

A.N.: Uff, I've finally given up and made a cheat sheet for this, listing all the characters that will appear (their names, ages, appearances, etc.) and drawing a map of the compound and surrounding area, so I don't get lost.


	14. know your wood

When he stepped out of the bathroom and into the hallway, Kakashi finally felt refreshed. He'd scrubbed off the dirt of three days on the road, had watched the water circling the drain at his feet slowly change from a light brown color to its normal transparent state while Gai had splashed around in the large tub.

Now breakfast was waiting.

* * *

Following the directions Jun had given them, Kakashi and Gai left their guest house and took a narrow stone path leading north. Kakashi scanned the area as they walked, taking in the neatly mown grass and the few scattered trees, some cherry blossom, some maple, and some Kakashi couldn't identify.

He pointed them out to Gai and asked for his opinion, but Gai just frowned, deep creases over his impressive brows, and shook his head.

"Hm," Kakashi scratched his chin under his scarf, his mood suddenly light. He leaned over, bumping shoulders with Gai, and whispered in his ear. "Pity that I didn't bring Tenzou-kun, he would have known…"

Gai's whole body stiffened as if he'd been struck by lightning. The sight was enough to make Kakashi smirk.

"Why would you say that?! I'm much more useful than he is!" And there was the indignation. Such a hot head under that bowl-cut.

"Hmmm… I was just thinking out loud. Never mind." Truth be told, these days he found this little ʻrivalryʼ – although Gai would be furious if he ever heard Kakashi call it that - between Gai and Tenzou cute. He'd had no patience for it when he was younger, but now he knew how to use it to his advantage. "You have to admit, he does know his way around wood."

Gai was glaring at him, ready to pout. As expected, the pun went right over his shiny bowl-cut. "It's a boring hobby," he said, "fit for a boring man."

"Huh, I thought you'd be more interested in plants, what with your love for springtime and all."

"It's a metaphor! For youth and beauty and new beginnings!"

_I enjoy teasing him way too much,_ Kakashi thought. He didn't have this kind of banter with anyone else. Well, the kids… sometimes, and Tenzou, of course, but it wasn't quite the same. Getting Gai all riled up was a special kind of pleasure. It was soothing somehow because it was so familiar, something he'd been doing since he was a kid. When he was with Gai, he could relax, he could, just for a little while, almost go back to a time when things had still been—

Kakashi sighed. He looped his arm through Gai's and interlaced their fingers again. "As long as no one's around, we can talk here." The terrain was flat, the few bushes and trees offering no real hiding spots. From where they stood, they were able to see across the whole compound to the houses and the wall surrounding the area. Kakashi made a mental note of the two gates, the one to the south which they'd passed through the night before and a second one to the north. They were the only points of entry and exit he could see. Of course, any genin would be able to get over the wall in seconds…

"What do you think?" he asked Gai, keeping his voice down just to be extra safe.

"It's big. We haven't been inside any of the other buildings yet."

"Hm." Kakashi turned his head, glancing back at the guest house where they'd spent the night, then he looked ahead again at the building to the north-east. Viewed from outside they looked exactly the same. "Tsukeyaki's to the north-west. Tsunade-sama doesn't think he's involved. She doesn't even think he _knows."_

"They only need to use one of the buildings. If I were a smuggler, I'd choose the one that was the easiest to get to. As close to one of the gates as possible."

Kakashi smiled. "If you were a smuggler, you'd choose something incredibly hard to get to for the challenge."

That got an actual laugh from Gai and a firm, warm squeeze of his hand. "That's my rival! You know me too well! But I meant if I was a weak, cowardly smuggler and not my normal, wonderful self, of course!"

"Of course," Kakashi said gravely. Then he sobered, his focus back on the mission. "The houses on the east side of the compound are a little closer to the gates than the ones on the west. We should look around our place tonight first. If we find nothing there, we'll tackle this one." With that he took the last few steps up to the second guest house.

_Time to see who we're dealing with._


	15. formalities

The door opened just as Gai reached for it, which made Kakashi instantly tense up with suspicion and the old, deeply ingrained fight or flight response of an experienced shinobi. He was quick enough to suppress the flinch within the split second it took the sliding door to reveal the boy standing on the other side of it and Gai was so in control of his body that nothing showed. Not even a twitch.

"Yatou-san, Shiba-san, you made it!" From the way Jun beamed at them, his eyes shining as if he was close to shedding tears of relief, one would have thought they'd crossed an ocean to get to the other guest house. Kakashi had to bite his lip to keep from making a sarcastic comment. Thankfully, he had Gai who could take any form of unwarranted joy and run with it.

"It's all thanks to your excellent directions, young man!" Gai let go of Kakashi's hand to give Jun a heartfelt thumbs up. And the boy actually blushed.

"That's so kind of you. Thank you…"

_We could literally see this place from our house. The whole way. All we had to do was walk down a straight path to a house that we were _able to see the whole time_. How could anyone have gotten lost? _

Kakashi held back. He did not sigh or groan. He did not roll his eye. He let the two men smile at each other, Gai his usual toothy, glowing smile and the boy a shy, modest version.

_Their brains seem to be moving at the same pace…_

"Please feel free to call me Souku," Kakashi said just to get the moment to pass before he had to bite off his tongue.

"Yes! No need to be so formal! Call me Tora!"

"Okay… Tora-san, Souku-san, right this way, please."

They followed Jun across the threshold, took off their sandals in the entrance area and neatly lined them up next to the other five pairs that were already there.

Jun led them down a hallway that looked identical to the one in their guest house. It made Kakashi wonder whether the two buildings had the same layout. Not unheard of for a place like this. Walking behind Gai, he glanced at the doors they passed. There were no voices to be heard, just the soft sounds of their footsteps on the hardwood floor, but Kakashi could smell the food and the faint aroma of freshly brewed green tea.

Jun stopped and opened a sliding door leading into a large room. "Please step right in," he said, gesturing for Kakashi and Gai to enter.

Kakashi let Gai go in first. He trailed behind like a shy little boy, his hand on Gai's sleeve.

They entered a dining room that reminded Kakashi of the ones he'd seen in the more expensive inns he'd stayed in. His eye, however, was immediately drawn not to the furniture or the view of the compound through the large windows but to the gangly young man setting the low table and the two people sitting seiza, waiting for the meal to be served. An elegant older man with wire-rimmed glasses, a black moustache and salt and pepper hair and—

Kakashi had to look twice to make sure. A woman? It couldn't be. The person was smiling. Their long, shiny chestnut hair was pinned up into a complex hairstyle, held in place by several ornate hairpins. Pale skin and a pastel green silk kimono with a subtle white flower pattern, a touch of makeup around the eyes and lips to cover up the telltale lines there. They weren't young, but their beauty hadn't faded completely yet. Kakashi's eye wandered below their chin and yes, there was an Adam's apple. So it _was_ a man.

"Ah, our new arrivals! Good morning!" the onnagata greeted them. His voice was soft and gentle. Not the high falsetto Kakashi had somehow expected.

Kakashi had seen kabuki plays in Tarakura. He knew that some men could pass more easily than others, but he'd never met someone as convincing as the one before him now. Besides, kabuki actors usually wore much more makeup…

"Good morning. Take a seat. I hope you don't mind the informality. I think we can do the introductions sitting down," the man with the glasses indicated the unoccupied space opposite them.

"That's fine," Kakashi said as he kneeled down on one of the soft pillows strewn around the table. After a moment's hesitation, Gai followed suit, but didn't stop staring at… him. This time Kakashi couldn't even blame him.

Completely unfazed by their reaction, the onnagata smiled. "In that case, I'm Ushizuki Yume and the elderly gentleman to my right is Ushizuki Naoki." He winked at Kakashi as if they were sharing a private joke.

"Elderly… You're one to talk," Naoki grumbled. "Nice to meet you." He nodded first at Gai, then at Kakashi.

The kid who'd somehow managed to slip away while Kakashi had been distracted, returned through a door on the opposite side of the room, carrying two bowls. "Mayoigo Riku. Osu," he drawled with no more than a glance in their direction. He was older than Jun, who ran over to help out, mid-apology already, but seemed to be a hired hand as well.

"Hm," Yume continued, his eyes darting past Kakashi to the door, "I'm sure you know Jun by now, so that leaves—"

Kakashi had enough chakra sensing skill to know who was coming down the hallway despite this person's almost nonexistent chakra signature. If it wouldn't have been so at odds with how he wanted to portray Souku, he would have sighed in annoyance. Since he couldn't allow himself any other reaction, he just sat there and endured as the door was ripped open and Kirie sauntered in, a leer on his face, aimless only for the second it took him to spot Kakashi.

"Oh, we've already met," he said, grinning. "Did you sleep well, little puppy?"


	16. shocking revelation!

Kakashi ducked his head, feigning embarrassment. He was a shy young former shop owner, he reminded himself. He couldn't walk over to this guy and punch his lights out or give him a sarcastic answer. No, he would blush and avert his eye like a good boy.

"Please excuse my nephew. He tends to be a little forward." Naoki sighed in a way that spoke of the longest of sufferings. "Kirie, please leave our guests alone."

"Aaah, Uncle, no need to be so strict. He knows I'm just kidding, don't you, Wan-chan?" With that Kirie sauntered over and plopped down right next to Kakashi who made a point of scooting closer to Gai. So close in fact that his left thigh was pressing against Gai's right. It probably looked as if he was about to crawl into his ʻboyfriend'sʼ lap, which was just as well.

"I…" Kakashi lowered his gaze.

"I apologize for him. He comes from a long line of cow-breeders, so he hasn't quite grasped the concept of manners yet," Yume said.

"Oi…" grumbled Naoki.

"Aunt Yume, you're hurting my feelings…" Kirie made a show of hanging his head.

"Who're you calling ʻAuntʼ?" The onnagata glared, raising an eyebrow. Kakashi noticed that his voice had sounded somewhat more male during the rebuff.

"Who indeed? I'm sure he meant to say ʻgrandmaʼ, so don't be too upset, Dear." Naoki patted Yume's hand in a mock comforting manner.

"I shall not even dignify that with an answer," said he and pulled his hand away. Looking at them Kakashi found it hard to tell who the older brother was. He guessed Naoki, but with Yume's getup he couldn't say for sure. What a peculiar family.

"You… really don't need to apologize. We're the ones who are in your debt!"Kakashi bowed as well as his sitting position allowed. He didn't want to find out how long this spiel would last if none of them interrupted it. "I…"

"Now now, you look as if you're about to cry. A pretty boy like you should never look so distressed." Kirie's hand hovered over Kakashi's right thigh for a second. Kakashi stared intently at it and, wondering idly if he would dare with Gai sitting right _there._ He didn't. The hand withdrew.

"What Kirie is trying to say is that you have nothing to be ashamed of. You've fallen on hard times. It could happen to anyone – in fact, it happened to all of us here."

"Plus, if you want to thank someone, it should be the person who granted you shelter in his home, should it not?" Naoki chimed in. "And that would be Yasu not us."

That was the turn in the conversation Kakashi had been waiting for. "Will he be here later? Tsukeyaki-sama?" he asked. "We really would like to thank him."

"Hm. It's only proper." Gai nodded.

"Hard to say. I'm afraid I can't make any promises." The mood at the table had changed instantly with that short sentence, making Kakashi wonder about the story behind Naoki's frown. "He's not been feeling well, you see."

"He's sick? Is… is there anything we can do?" he hastened to ask.

Yume shook his head and smiled. His smile, Kakashi noted, looked perfectly sincere. "No, that's quite alright."

"Not unless you can bring the dead back to life…" It had been nothing more than a whisper, but since Kirie was sitting directly next to him, Kakashi couldn't help overhearing it. And apparently he wasn't the only one with good ears.

"Tsukeyaki-san is _dead_?!" Kakashi cringed at Gai's outburst. He put his hand on Gai's muscular thigh in something that looked like a loving gesture. Then he dug his fingernails into the fabric of Gai's pants.

"No! It's nothing like that," Naoki said quickly.

"Then why did he say—" In the vain hope that Gai would finally understand his message and _shut up_, Kakashi squeezed harder.

"Yasu lost someone he loved. It has been very hard on him. On all of us," Yume said.

"Oh." Gai deflated a little. And there he'd probably thought he'd solved the great mystery behind the recent increase in crime around the property. Kakashi, though, carefully stowed away this new bit of information.

_So there's been a death… Maybe someone else was asking uncomfortable questions…_

"I see. We're very sorry. _We shouldn't have pried_." To make up for the pain he'd caused, Kakashi gave the Gai's thigh a soothing rub.

"That's okay. It's probably for the best that you know. After all, you're going to stay a while, aren't you?" Yume asked.

They were all smiling now and for once Kakashi found it hard to tell which smiles beside his own were fake.


	17. never bite off more than you can chew!

After Kakashi had introduced Gai and himself, they ate more or less in silence. Jun and Riku served the food, then sat down at the table as well. For his breakfast Kakashi picked plain rice with a boiled egg and green tea. When he pushed his scarf down to eat, he immediately felt Kirie's eyes latch onto his lips. He ignored the look as best as he could and kept eating. Next to him, Gai inhaled his portion of rice mixed with raw egg in less than two minutes.

"Can I have seconds?" Gai asked, holding out his empty bowl like a beggar in the street.

It took him another three minutes before he was finished again and repeated the gesture. "More please?"

_Oi, oi, you're starting to look like you're taking advantage…_

"Tora…" Kakashi forced an embarrassed chuckle. He turned to Naoki and Yume. "I'm really sorry… We were on the road for a long time, you see…"

"Hn? Why're y' apologizin'?" Gai asked around a mouthful of rice.

"No, no, that's quite alright! You poor things must have been close to starving! Eat as much as you want! Don't be shy!" Yume pushed another helping towards Gai and they watched in something like awe as he shoveled it down.

"He sure swallows everything that goes into that mouth, doesn't he?" whispered Kirie, his voice only loud enough to reach Kakashi's ears. "I've been wondering what someone like you could see in a guy like him, but… now that I'm looking at him in the light of day, I gotta admit that he does have nice lips…"

Kakashi pretended not to hear the remark, but he did glance at Gai's mouth. Bits of rice were sticking to his lips; a smear of egg was on his chin. Thick and translucent, it looked like mucus.

_Nice lips, eh?_

They looked average to Kakashi.

"By the way, how far exactly did you travel? You're from way down south, right?" His tone sugary-sweet, Kirie shot Kakashi a sly smile. He was fishing for something, trying to catch them out.

_What are you suspecting?_ Kakashi wondered.

"Yes, we're from a small village near the coast. We had to walk for about a week since we couldn't afford to rent horses," he said.

"Well, no wonder you're in bad shape…" Naoki nodded, a compassionate look on his face.

"And what exactly happened to you?" Apparently Kirie wasn't going to let this go any time soon, but Kakashi had come prepared. He had his story; all he needed to do was tell it in a believable manner.

"A fire. We lost everything." He looked down into his bowl, at his half-eaten portion of rice sitting sadly at the bottom.

"How horrible!" Yume covered his mouth with his hand as he gasped in exaggerated shock. Being overly dramatic was probably something he considered feminine, Kakashi thought. Or maybe it was just his personality.

"How'd you know where to come knocking?" Kirie's tone was still playful, but his gaze was boring into Kakashi, searching for… something.

"Omiyage Satoru-san…? He's an acquaintance of Tsukeyaki-sama?" Kakashi made himself shrink away from those accusing eyes. Next to him, Gai was still eating, only mildly interested in the conversation. "He told us to ask for help here."

"Hmmm, so just like that you came all this way? How well do you even know Satoru?"

Naoki cleared his throat. "Kirie, really…"

"We worked with him occasionally… I'm sorry… We really had nowhere else to go." With feigned nervousness Kakashi tugged at his scarf.

"No family?" prodded Kirie.

"My parents passed away when I was still a child and Tora… Tora's father… He doesn't… approve of me."

There was a cough and a sputter as Gai seemed to choke on his rice.

Kakashi didn't miss a beat. He reached out, lovingly patted Gai's back and said, "I'm sorry. It's very difficult for him."

"I see." Another grave nod from Naoki.

"Believe me, we understand," said Yume.

Out of the corner of his eye Kakashi saw an anguished look cross Jun's face. Riku on the other hand was resting his cheek in his open palm and appeared to be about to fall asleep.

Gai was still coughing a little, so Kakashi gently rubbed soothing circles on his back.


	18. more like a baby fox!

Breakfast ended with Riku and Jun clearing away their bowls and taking them to the back room – the kitchen probably. As a charity case, Kakashi decided that Souku couldn't take it any longer. He sat up straight, ready to jump on his feet as soon as he would get the order and addressed the two men sitting opposite him and Gai.

"Is there anything we can do? If you have work, we'd be—"

Yume stopped him with a wave of his hand.

"That's not necessary. Why don't you just rest for today, hm? You've come such a long way after all."

"It wouldn't be a problem… Please, we don't want to take advantage." Helping out would provide so many opportunities to snoop around; Kakashi wasn't ready to give up on the chance yet. He hung his head like a scolded dog and stared at his thighs without blinking, hoping his eye would tear up and give his expression that extra edge of desperation.

"Of course! You can give me any task! There's nothing I can't do!" Gai sounded more like a braggart than anything else, but Kakashi gave him credit for trying.

"Oh? _Nothing,_ eh?" whispered Kirie, probably with a wink. Kakashi refused to look.

"Really. It's fine. We all pitch in here and we've never had anyone who wasn't willing to carry his weight. I can already tell that you're no exception, but there's no point in overdoing it. You must be tired, so use this day to get some rest and we'll talk about how you can help out tomorrow, okay?" Naoki spoke with fatherly serenity. If the table hadn't been in the way, he might have reached out and put a hand on Kakashi's shoulder.

"You're being too generous… I don't know what to say… Thank you so much…" Kakashi glanced up, his eye burning and moist.

"Oh no, it's nothing!" Seeing his expression, the unshed tears shining in his eye, Yume seemed eager to put him at ease. "After what you've been through, it's the least we can do."

"Tora-kun, your beloved sure is sensitive, isn't he? You must spend a lot of time comforting him," said Kirie. His tone was perfectly neutral, but Kakashi could have spotted the sarcasm from miles away.

Gai, however…

"Hm? Ah, yes! My Souku is a delicate little flower! He's kind and beautiful and tender! I can't tell you how often I lie awake at night, unable to sleep because I worry about him so much! He is like a fluffy, newborn kitten making its first unsure steps in the world!"

_Oi, you're putting it on a little thick there… _Kakashi wanted to say but of course he couldn't. All he could do was sit there and force a self-conscious smile.

"That's quite the image…" Naoki chuckled. He looked ill at ease, though.

"How poetic, Tora-san… Your love is so pure!" exclaimed Jun, just as Kakashi heard Riku mumble "Eurgh, I think I'm gonna puke…"

With all the dignity of a judge calling his court to order, Yume cleared his throat. "Get some rest for now. We can talk more at dinner and if you want, Riku can show you around the property later."

Riku grumbled when he heard his name, but no one paid him any attention.

"Thank you," Kakashi repeated. He couldn't wait for that guided tour.


	19. grateful

They walked out into the sunshine hand in hand, leaving the others to do whatever it was they did. The conversation hadn't gone the way Kakashi had expected, but all in all it could have been worse. He wasn't dissatisfied, only wary. He'd sensed an unease around the table, suspicion dressed up in superficial politeness.

In a way, Kirie with his straightforward attacks was easier to deal with than the other men.

"Let's sit in the grass for little while. I really am tired," Kakashi said as he led Gai to a tree close to the compound's center. He'd chosen a place from which they would be able to see everything that was going on around them. When they sat down, Kakashi made a point of resting his head on against Gai's shoulder, but even as he did so, he wondered why they had bothered in the first place. None of the men they'd met seemed to be in a relationship. They'd barely even hinted at their sexuality, except for Kirie that was, but he was so over the top that his behavior seemed more like an act than anything else.

_I could have just showed up by myself,_ Kakashi thought.

He sighed, rubbing his cheek against Gai's shoulder like a cat. The fabric of his scarf felt smooth and cool on his skin. Warmed by the sun, Kakashi found himself thinking that he wouldn't mind a little nap in the shadow of this tree. If nothing else, Gai made for a half-decent pillow.

Or so he'd thought before his pillow turned his head, glared at him with narrowed eyes under furrowed monster-brows and said in a threatening half-whisper, "About what you said before… you're wrong!"

"Hm? What are you talking about?" Paranoid for obvious reasons, Kakashi looked around to make sure that there was no one within hearing distance. As far as he could tell, they were the only people outside. Well, good. For now.

Gai didn't even pause to take a breath."My father! He loved you! He had nothing but respect and tender concern for you! He always asked how you were and that one time on your birthday he made me give you a present although _I_ didn't even want to!"

_That has been on your mind all this time? _Had it been any other person, Kakashi wouldn't have believed it. With Gai, though… _I probably should have seen this coming…_

He leaned closer until only the thin fabric of his scarf was between his lips and the shell of Gai's ear and whispered, "First of all, you do realize that I wasn't talking about your actual father, right? Remember the part where we're pretending to be other people? I was talking about Tora-kun's entirely fictional father, not Dai-san." With that out of the way, Kakashi continued in a voice dripping with hurt, "And also… are we talking about my _eighth _birthday here? Your dad _made _you give me that present? That breaks my heart."

"Grgh… I… Why couldn't _your_ father have been the disapproving one?"

"You mean _Souku's?_ No reason. I made that story up on the spot." He sighed, slipping his arm around Gai's shoulder to pull him even closer. If they were being watched it would look like Souku was whispering sweet nothings into his lover's ear.

The truth was that he couldn't have said something like _My father disowned me. _A sentence like that would have stuck in his throat. It had been so much easier to say _Tora's father _instead_. _

But now he had to deal with this.

"Gai, I would never talk badly about your father. I admire him. He was a great man, a true hero of the Leaf. You know that."

Gai flinched as though he had been stung.

"What?"

Instead of a reply, Kakashi only got a muffled choking noise. Abruptly, Gai turned his head away and stared at the empty garden. Kakashi followed his gaze, but there was absolutely nothing of note. A tiny sniffling noise gave Gai away.

"Are you crying?" Kakashi asked, peeved. "Hey, I'm supposed to be the crybaby in this relationship…"

As expected, Gai whipped around at that, showing Kakashi a face that was in serious danger of being eroded by floods of tears and snot. "I didn't know you felt this way. You've never said anything like this before… rival…"

Kakashi leaned away. "Geez, come on…"

_What did you think? He saved you… Of course I'm… _

This conversation was getting far too troublesome for his tastes, so he grabbed the back of Gai's neck and pulled him roughly towards himself until their foreheads – the only part of Gai's face that was covered in either mucus or tears – were touching.

"We don't have time for this. We're on a mission here, understood?" Kakashi said, channeling his old Anbu self.

"Hah!" Gai swallowed his tears and used his sleeve to wipe at his eyes.

For the few moments it took Gai to compose himself Kakashi turned away. He would keep an eye on the houses. Someone had to pay attention to their surroundings, after all, and if that meant blocking out certain memories...

_I'm not that boy anymore..._ Kakashi thought, his eye trained on a random window, a dark rectangle seemingly leading nowhere. Next to him Gai sniffed again.

_Am I?_


	20. perchance to dream

"So what do you think?" Kakashi asked as he watched Jun come out of the house they'd had breakfast in. The boy was holding something in his hands; the distance made it difficult to say for sure but to Kakashi it looked like a covered tray.

Gai followed his gaze. "About him?" he asked.

Kakashi nodded. "And the others."

There was a brief silence that marked Gai's typical thinking process. Then he beamed, also typical. "Jun-kun seems like an honest, hard-working young man! In fact, he reminds me a little of my precious Lee!"

In the distance, Jun waved to them. Kakashi and Gai waved back.

"Ah, so he's definitely evil…" Kakashi said mid-wave.

"What?!" Gai was too easy to tease, far too easy. But still delicious, what with that flush of anger spreading across the bridge of his nose.

Kakashi chuckled. "Relax, I'm kidding. But, seriously, don't you find it strange that he's here? By civilian law he's still just a kid and he's living with a bunch of strange men? Where are his parents in this?"

"He might have lost them."

"Maybe…" Kakashi wondered if they weren't a little quick to assume someone was an orphan. It was so common in their world – the shinobi world – that they tended to jump to this conclusion. Where civilian life was concerned they were pretty clueless. "What about Tsukeyaki?"

"Hmpf, I still think he's dead."

"You're not going to let that theory go, huh?"

"We haven't seen him!"

_You're right_, Kakashi thought, _we haven't. Perhaps it's time for a change of plan. And yet…_

"True, but why would they even let us in here if they were trying to cover up something as big as that?" Kakashi was starting to grow tired of whispering into Gai's ear. He shifted a little and gave Gai some room.

"Hmmmm, perhaps they're planning to hold us hostage! Or to make us accomplices to their terrible crime!" Even Gai didn't sound convinced.

Kakashi sighed, "… I guess we can always hope," he said. _If only they tried something,_ was what he was thinking. Then Kakashi and Gai would fight them and win and get to go home early.

Well, if he had to be here, then at least… Glancing at Gai's lap, Kakashi had an idea. "Stay like this… wait…" He half-turned and, using Gai's thigh as a pillow, lay down on the grass. "That's not bad… I'm going to take a nap. Wake me when the guided tour starts, alright?"

"What?! You're just going to sleep? But—"

Kakashi patted Gai's thigh and said in his sweetest voice, "Tora… I'm exhausted. Is it okay with you if I take a nap, my love?" He looked up, his eye meeting Gai's, his tone changing by a tiny fraction, giving it a serious edge that no one but Gai would have been able to detect. "You'll watch over me, right?"

A shadow seemed to flash across Gai's face.

"Always," he said gravely.

Under the thin fabric of his scarf Kakashi smiled. He allowed his eye to slide shut. Sometimes darkness helped him think. That and the warmth of Gai's body, the steady sound of his breathing and familiar chakra signature.

_So what could be the solution, _Kakashi wondered, compiling a mental list of feasible scenarios.

_A) They're all innocent and there's a different group of criminals in the area. Not unlikely. More often than not illegal weapons trade is done by missing nin. They're more powerful than civilians and need the income. However, missing nin seldom stay in one place for long. It's far too dangerous for bingo book criminals and smaller fry can rarely manage to hold their own against the competition for an extended period of time. Then there's B) One or more of our new friends have struck up a deal with a supplier, giving them storage space and maybe even shelter here without the others finding out. Or C) They're all involved in this – either including Tsukeyaki or with him dead or locked up somewhere. Then again, if he really is grieving, he might be alive and well but completely oblivious…_

_Or maybe none of the above…_

Kakashi breathed in deeply and forced himself to relax.

_I guess we'll just have to find out_, he thought, allowing himself to slip into the warm embrace of sleep.

* * *

A.N.: Hey guys, first of all, thanks for reading and reviewing! Sadly, I'm going to have to take a little break from this for a bit. (Hopefully no more than a couple of days.) I really need that break, I think, plus RL is going to get pretty busy starting Monday. So, sorry... Also I've switched off PMing. I don't want long arguments carrying over. I'm sorry if people don't like my writing, but it is what it is and I write what I enjoy writing. /shrug Is Gai going to kick serious ass at some point in this story? Is he going to tear people apart with his bare hands? Seriously, look at my track record. But he's still going to be a dork too. And, yeah, as MadroxMR suspected Kakashi is not the most reliable of narrators (thanks Madrox!). Again, it's just fic, don't take it super seriously, drop it if it upsets you, try to have fun. Life's too short. (and, yeah, so are my chapters... I'm really trying to squeeze this one in between rl stuff. It's messy, I know, but I hope to pull through with this one, to finish it and give it good clean-up after. Thanks for bearing with me!)


	21. little boy lost

Kakashi blinked into bright sunlight, trying to get rid of the neon afterimages painted on the inside of his eyelids. He yawned and stretched like a satisfied cat, his limbs still heavy from sleep. Gai was giving him a _look_, and not a very loving one. Come to think of it, Gai's hand was on Kakashi's shoulder, squeezing painfully.

"Yume-san," Gai said and his eyes darted past Kakashi to the man approaching them.

"Thanks for waking me up," Kakashi replied under his breath as he sat up. Quickly, he straightened his clothes. He knew he was looking flustered, which was exactly how he wanted to look.

"Yume-san! Is everything alright?" he called, watching the older man stride closer, the hem of his long kimono swishing through the grass. Strands of hair had come loose and were falling into Yume's eyes. He didn't look distressed as much as annoyed, but his expression was still enough to cause both Gai and Kakashi to get to their feet in alarm.

"It's nothing, really, you don't have to—" Yume sighed. They were already standing in front of him. "Get up," he finished lamely. "I'm sorry." He glanced over his shoulder as if he was afraid he'd been followed. "You haven't seen Riku, have you?"

"No." Gai shook his head.

"Is he missing?" Kakashi gasped, getting reacquainted with playing timid little Souku.

His question made Yume snort. "Not really. I just told him to go and show you around the compound… about half an hour ago?"

"Oh…" Shamed, Kakashi hung his head.

Yume, however, smiled at him.

"Don't worry; knowing him, he's snuck off to take a nap somewhere. I guess I could ask Jun to fill in for him… Or maybe I'll just give you that tour myself… but…" he broke off, looking from Kakashi to Gai, and frowned. "If you don't mind waiting a little longer, I'd like to go find Riku. That boy is so lazy… I can't reward his behavior by just letting him off the hook!"

"We don't mind waiting, but you don't have to force him—"

"No, Yume-san is right! A young man should take his duties seriously!" Gai nodded gravely.

"If he doesn't want to… I mean if it's a bother… I'm sure we can find our own way around…" _I wonder how often he sneaks off_, Kakashi thought as he stuttered his line. _Riku, hm? Maybe he's not as lazy as he seems._

"I'm sure you can, but why should you have to? You're guests here. Don't worry about Riku's feelings. Showing you around can hardly be considered work. That kid barely does anything as it is." Yume shook his head. "So please wait here."

"Of course! Thank you… You're being too kind…" Watching Yume turn around and walk away, Kakashi trailed off. He glanced at Gai who caught his eye and held his gaze.

_What do you think? _

As if able to read his thoughts, Gai raised one bushy eyebrow, flashing Kakashi an expression he could only read as _Suspicious; let's see what happens._

_My thoughts exactly…_

Kakashi trained his eye on Yume again. The older man was hurrying across the lawn towards the south-west building. Under his mask Kakashi's docile smile turned feral.

* * *

"Hmmm, okay…" Sleepily, Riku blinked at them from under his short reddish-brown fringe. "Don't really get what all the fuss is about, but if you want me to show you around this badly, I guess I've got no choice." He shrugged before slipping his hands into his pockets. His gaze brushed Gai and Kakashi, then settled on some random spot in the distance. Complete disinterest.

"Oi! We didn't ask you to do this, young man!" Gai was instantly indignant. He glared at their young guide."Also, stand up straight; you're ruining your posture!"

"Hahhh, let's just go, old man," drawled Riku, pulling a face as if he'd taken a sip of sour milk.

For a split second, Gai was actually dumbstruck. Then he erupted. _Predictable like an old geyser,_ Kakashi thought. "_Old man_?! Who do you think you're calling-"

Time to intervene.

Kakashi quickly stepped in front of Gai.

"Tora! Be nice; he doesn't mean it. It's very kind of Riku-kun to sacrifice his time for us!" Once he had Gai down from frothing at the mouth to mere scowl, he turned to Riku who barely even seemed to be paying attention. "Thank you, Riku-kun! We're sorry for causing you trouble."

"…whatever." The kid shrugged his bony shoulders. "Let's just get this over with." He started walking without waiting for a reply.

* * *

It was a short tour.

Riku lead them around the compound, stopping in front of the gates and the houses to say a few words, only to move on with a shrug after less than a minute.

"Um…," Kakashi would say whenever Riku was about to take off again. "I'm sorry, but…" or "Excuse me, is this where…"

Riku's replies were monosyllabic at best.

He pointed out that their building had a kitchen which they could use whenever they wanted. It was the first time Kakashi realized that Gai and he had been sharing the guest house with Riku and Kirie who both had their own rooms. Jun lived with Naoki and Yume, Riku told them.

"Tsukeyaki-san lives alone?"

"Yeah."

Kakashi thought about following up with another question, but Riku had already turned away.

"That's it," he said. "The house to the south-west is currently empty. It used to be a stable. We've been thinking about doing some rebuilding in the future." He shrugged.

Gai took that as his cue. "If you need help-!"

"Nah, that's fine. Yume'll probably come up with something you can do soon enough."

"Is there any place to shop… I mean… if we needed…?"

"The next village is six kilometers to the south. Naoki's got some arrangement with one of the farmers in the area. The old guy comes by once a week and delivers food and stuff, but if there's anything you need right now, you can always walk. You got some pressing business?"

"No, just… We didn't bring much… Clothes… food…" Kakashi made a show of shuffling his feet. "Only what we could carry... Well, most of it was lost in the fire anyway…"

"You don't need to worry about that. Yume won't let you starve. Anyway, I gotta go. If you need anything else, just ask Jun." With that Riku left them standing in front of their guest house, no closer to any kind of solution.

* * *

"Well, that was pointless," Kakashi whispered once they were in their room. He'd pressed up close to Gai, hugging him from behind, and spoke directly into his ear. Having to communicate like this was a nuisance, but it wasn't exactly hard to do. Although being in Gai's personal space all the time still felt weird, it wasn't unbearable. He shifted when he felt the curve of Gai's buttocks press against his crotch and bit his lip. Not completely unbearable.

Gai was staring out of the window, oblivious. "What a rude kid…" he said. His gaze traversed the empty compound. If he was uncomfortable with Kakashi practically glued to his back, he didn't show it. "We should definitely check out that stable."

"Hn, but not tonight…"

"I know! Still, it's suspicious."

"Actually, about tonight…" Kakashi shifted again, trying to escape the tingling in his lower regions. Through the window he could see someone walking across the lawn. He pretended to nuzzle Gai's cheek as he spoke. "I've been thinking we should change our plan."

"Huh? What do you mean? Why?" Kakashi didn't have to look to know that Gai's eyes were on the figure outside as well. His cheek was warm against Kakashi's skin.

Wanting to get the moment over with, Kakashi talked fast. "Getting to Tsukeyaki might be easier for one person going alone." This close to Gai it felt as if his soft rush of words was soaked up by Gai's pores. It was a distracting feeling so Kakashi tried to ignore it and kept going. "There's not much cover in the compound and I don't want to use henge, not as long as we're not a hundred percent sure there isn't someone around who can sense chakra. So I've been thinking it might be better if you go in there without me tonight. You're faster than me and you rely less on chakra. I'm going to look around this place, see what our friends Riku and Kirie get up to when they think no one's watching."

There was a moment of silence as Gai processed. Then, "Are you sure?"

Kakashi snorted. "Only if you think you can handle it."

That got the desired reaction. "Hmpf. You know I can handle it! I'm worried about_ you_."

For a second Kakashi allowed himself to soak in Gai's stupid warmth.

"Are you really?" he murmured against the heated skin of Gai's neck. He heard Gai exhale, a hint of exasperation. If he raised his head to look, Kakashi thought, he'd probably see Gai's lips quirk into a reluctant smile.

"Didn't think so," Kakashi said and the windowpane reflected a shadow of his own smirk back at him.


End file.
